The Beginning of the Incel Movement

Santa Barbara County Sheriff identifies murder suspect Elliot Rodger.

Incels or involuntary celibates have been part of Western society since the 1990s.  However, the Incel movement came to light when a hero among violent Incels – Elliot Rodgers, killed six people and then himself in Isla Vista, California, in his vengeance against women. 

A Canadian student, Alana was having problems developing romantic relationships when she formed the Incel movement in the 1990s. 

She felt inept in social situations and did not want to suffer alone, so she created a forum. In this forum,  people who felt alone and found it challenging to interact could support and help each other. 

Soon after, Alana discovered that she was bisexual. When she entered into a healthy relationship, she discontinued the forum as she felt she could no longer help them out. 

A Dark Turn for the Incel Movement

But like all good things, misogyny, patriarchy, and hypocrisy brought an end to the initial Incel movement. It transformed into a crusade initiated by men with violent urges who banned women and spread hate. 

A Peek into their Minds

These destructive Incels viewed women as the root cause of their behavior. They believe that if society had not given women the freedom to act as they wish, there would be no Incel Movement.

A world where women are liberated enough to choose who they have sexual relationships is an alien notion to them. 

Incels who turn violent are the product of patriarchal norms that have already existed for thousands of years. Many of the men involved in the transformed Incel movement have had some scarring childhood or adolescent memories. When bad experiences get mixed with misogynistic views, it triggers them. 

Incel Movement is a Reflection of Patriarchy

To eradicate this misogynistic rage from Incels, understanding their anger and perspective is essential to bring an end to the violent Incel movement. 

Society requires self-analysis as to why problems like these arise. Why do Western societies allow the rapid escalation of violent pornography?  Why they oversexualize women and girls in the media?

Society should indeed punish Violent Incels, but their opinion needs to be listened to and rectified with reason.

T’s Relentless Drive to Persevere against all odds

T persevered through it all with the help of his music.

T, the lead singer of the Southern Time Band, has been HIV positive since the 1990s, which was extremely difficult as he was very young, and it caused problems for him to form sexual and romantic relationships.

His primary source of motivation that helped him cope with his life’s negativity was his music, a constant drive to tell his story, and strong support from his friends and mother. He is an outstanding example of turning a disaster into a dream.

From 1997 until 2017, T identified as an involuntary celibate like many people living with HIV and its accompanying stigma.  He did not even approach HIV negative women out of fear of rejection.  

T and his family on his wedding day.

However, this situation changed when he discovered U=U’s scientifically-verified fact (and Undetectable virus means that a person’s HIV is Untransmutable). T is now in a healthy relationship and got married on September 26, 2020, to a beautiful HIV negative woman!

A Small Push in the Right Direction can Change a Life

Maybe one young potentially-violent Incel mind can be persuaded with the right guidance to let go of rage and pursue a brighter future.

But for all the havoc violent Incels have caused by actual attacks to bash women, society must severely address violent incels as soon as possible for its health and stability!

Incels have lost their community connections and connection with nature. For, having sex is natural and should be celebrated and not feared, stigmatized, or shamed!!!